I think many people who know my spouse and I as a couple have questions. They are mostly questions for her and tend to center on, “So, are you still gay or what? How can you stay together? I could never stay with my spouse if they ‘changed genders.'” Continue reading Why are you such a lucky bastard?
What do you mean these eggs are expired? Content warning: infertility Our honeymoon is amazing. Yes amazing for all the typical reasons, but also…wheat berry pancakes. I am not kidding around. They are incredible. I don’t even like pancakes but these? Memorable. Delicious. It’s our first weekend home after our honeymoon. Saturday morning breakfast at a restaurant we’d never been to before. The waitress is strangely devoid of boundaries and keeps hanging all over Anji, much to Anji’s discomfort. At some point one of us informs her that her over familiarity is inappropriate and unappreciated. Driving home that afternoon I … Continue reading A love story – Part 6
I stop wanting to ever go back to my apartment. We spend time apart because it seems like something we should do or because it is something we have to do. But we aren’t that into it. It isn’t as fun as being together. It seems a bit like a waste of time. I am approaching 30. Anji is twelve years older than I am. We feel a bit short changed for not finding each other sooner and incredibly fortunate to have done so at all. There is no one I can think of who will say, “Four months of … Continue reading A love story – Part 5
We have been dating for two weeks. My parents want me to visit. I just saw my mother a few weeks ago. But since moving to the Pacific Northwest about 6 years before, I had only been home maybe three times. This was primarily due to financial constraints. The fact that my parents moved 4 hours away from the town I grew up in shortly after I moved was an added complication. My mom had a plane ticket voucher from a prior trip where there was a layover debacle. The voucher was set to expire in about 6 weeks. I … Continue reading A love story – Part 4
We are driving around Ballard. By “we,” I mean “she”, she is driving and I am, as I have been since, in the passenger seat. To this day I can’t drive in Seattle without a map but Anji has the general lay of the land and doesn’t need that kind of accommodation. “I can’t imagine growing old and never having a child.” She is surprised, intrigued…pensive. “I have never imagined having another child.” The car becomes silent, but unexpectedly comfortable. A few intersections pass by the windows. It’s a beautiful evening. The streetlights cast an amber glow interrupted by the … Continue reading A love story – Part 3
It’s 2010. I am living in an apartment that I can barely afford. My judgement is clouded by the abrupt end to my marriage. I have always had a strong moral compass, to the point of rigidity. But this time in my life, is not my best. I find myself doing things I shouldn’t be doing. I can’t bring myself to care. But I do recognize that Anji has her shit too together to get wrapped up in mine. Either later that night (the night of secret family recipe sausage – try to follow along) or the next morning I … Continue reading A love story – Part 2
When I was 23 I applied for a job managing a few million dollars in rental assistance for people with disabilities who were also experiencing homelessness at entry. I don’t know if I was qualified – per se – I mean, in retrospect that seems like a lot of money to let a 23 year old manage but…it turned out I was pretty good at it. Part of my job was to run a monthly meeting with other non-profits who were providing services to the people in housing. It was pretty intimidating as many of the folks in the room … Continue reading A love story – Part 1
That's Mr. Gender to You 